I am packing my life into boxes... well, for University of course! Except right now I'm obviously procrastinating. I don't really think it's hit me yet that I'm leaving Fort St. John behind. I'm sure it will hit me once I'm in Victoria. The thing is I don't even know if I know what's actually happening, and I'm worried I'm not taking this seriously because I have no feelings about leaving. In July I was all "EAT MY DUST FORT ST JOHN I HOPE YOU WITHER IN SELF LOATHING ABYSS WITHOUT ME MUHAHA IM LEAVING BITCH, CHEERS!" and all that. But now it's different. I'm still happy that I'll be able to start fresh but it's starting to don on me that I'm leaving things behind.. perhaps unfinished. Like for instance I had a dream a few nights ago where all my friends were saying goodbye to me and we were all crying. Not to mention that I've been having trouble sleeping these last few days. I really hope my body's not trying to tell me something. Like that I'm gonna FAIL at living this next step of life. The thing is though that in my head I'm not scared (even though I'm sure my body's been feeling anxious for a while).
Also another thing I've been thinking about is friends. I better make some good-ass friends. They better be down to have some good times if you know what I mean. I'm moving into residence so I know I'll meet lots of people but I wanna make sure I meet the right people for me. It is also very important to me that I not lose touch with my friends here. That would just suck balls. Seriously.
**Woah, I just got really sidetracked for a second and made up a scenario in my head about me coming back to town next April and discovering that there's a new girl that looks alot like me and dresses like me and everyone's friends with her. I'm pretty sure I'd cry.... and then punch the absolute shit out of her.
***There's been an ant doing circles beside my computer for the past hour. I feel bad for it because it's apparent that it's lost his way.
But anyway I will probably write vigorously about my adventures (or non-adventures) in University. So if you wish to stalk my collegiate life then you should probably do so through this blog. I promise I'll try and keep it up to date. I should probably go finish packing now. Don't wanna show up to Victoria with no underwear! So I will sign off by quoting Pudge from "Looking For Alaska" by John Green and Francois Rabelais before him: "I go to seek a Great Perhaps"
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Hey there (:
ReplyDeleteI just graduated from highschool, and when I stumbled upon your blog and read this, well, I just wanted to tell you that I feel exactly the same right now. I'm thrilled about starting a new life, but on the other hand I'm also very scared and sad about leaving my highschool and the life I've grown to love. It's a very scary thing, moving on with your life. Since you posted this almost a year ago I wanted to ask how you are doing now ^^